January 12, 2004

Cash-Starved Adjuncts Click Here

A reader who wishes to remain anonymous emailed me with a novel solution to the adjunct's cash flow problem:

Check out this Web site: www.headvertise.com

So I clicked, and then read the following:

Collegians are a highly attractive market, however students are increasingly hard to reach. Largely, they are immune to traditional advertising methods, as it plagues them day in and out, online and off. Soon, with the abundance of marketing thrown at them from every direction, even the most stimulating traditional marketing campaigns will go unnoticed.

Being a new venue, we are offering lower than industry rates for the services we provide. We do it all, we are flexible, and we have teams of willing students, who want to market your product, run sampling campaigns, and who will do what it takes to get your product or service noticed. We do it all with forehead advertising™!

As my anonymous reader suggests, who better than the instructor at the front of the classroom to reach these legions of collegians suffering from advertising ennui?

A company can pay to have legions of college students
across America sport temporary tattoos of the company's
logo on their foreheads. The students earn about $200
per week for wearing the tattoo continuously Monday
through Friday.

Could you imagine what would happen if an underpaid,
disgruntled adjunct decided to get in on the act?

If the adjunct, at a small Catholic liberal arts college,
is only making $1800 for a single section of freshman
composition, the adjunct would make more in a semester
sporting the temporary tattoo.

Sure, it's crass, commercial and demonstrates bad taste,
but that's a lot of cash for doing nothing.

What's more, it would probably get people on campus
talking about how poorly adjuncts are treated.

Anonymous reader has a point. Still, it's not exactly "a lot of cash for doing nothing." It's a nice bit of cash for agreeing to make a spectacle of oneself by turning one's very person into a walking billboard. But as headvertise puts it (under Benefits of Headvertising), you'll have "money for books (or beer)" and "all the cool kids are doing it."

(We're all going to hell in a handcart, aren't we?)

Posted by Invisible Adjunct at January 12, 2004 07:25 PM

"If the adjunct, at a small Catholic liberal arts college,is only making $1800 for a single section of freshman composition, the adjunct would make more in a semester sporting the temporary tattoo."

Oooh. Given my stance on how many Catholic liberal arts colleges treat their adjuncts, I can see the possibilities now . . . . I wonder if anyone would pay an adjunct to tattoo "social justice for all" or "living wage" as headvertising for students at Catholic colleges?

Posted by: Academy Girl at January 12, 2004 08:20 PM

$1800 for teaching one class? I'm getting $1200 for teaching two! But I'm just a Ph.D. candidate; I haven't yet reached even adjunct status.

Posted by: Lady of Shalott at January 12, 2004 09:48 PM

$1200 for teaching two classes. Behold the pauperization of a profession.

Posted by: Invisible Adjunct at January 12, 2004 09:59 PM

$600 per class?!

Do your robot masters ever give you a break from moving the giant clock hands back and forth?

Posted by: J.V.C. at January 12, 2004 10:15 PM

Fantastic! When are they coming to the UK so I can get one too. (Never mind that no one will see me because I'm in front of a computer all day)

Posted by: Duckling at January 13, 2004 09:40 AM

Duckling - web cam. Go grab a domain name with a XXXX-sounding name, and make big $$$$$$! [sorry, I don't know how to get the 'pound' and 'euro' symbols on my US keyboard].

Posted by: Barry at January 13, 2004 01:08 PM

For those who are qualified, nude dancing pays amazingly well.

Posted by: zizka at January 13, 2004 02:43 PM

The UK already has the head tattoo thing going. As we don't think we can reach the UK any time soon, take a look at our UK competition: http://www.cunningwork.com/

If you have any praise or hatemail for us, please send it to jkapust@headvertise.com

We respond to it all!

Justin Kapust
President, Promotions & Marketing
Headvertise (Kapust-Allen Enterprises LLC)

Posted by: Justin Kapust at January 14, 2004 04:38 AM

I once suggested to a class of mostly business students that a good marketing strategy might be to send free T-shirts to young professors with promises of cash if they promise to wear them in front of class a few times a semester. People in front of classrooms are stared at for hours a day. It is like those people who get paid to wear caps with logos on them, on TV.

On the other hand, it might backfire if you start to associate some product with that really boring professor you had to stare at for the semester who always wore the same grimey AOL T-shirt.

Perhaps a marketing trial might be in order. These head things are a bit too conspicuous for me. A T-Shirt is subtle, but still prominent.

Posted by: KC at January 16, 2004 10:26 PM